STRUCTURING A SCENE
The purpose of a scene is to move the story along. The scene is a small section of the big picture that gives the author the structure to form his or her story, organize it and play it out for the reader. The scene is where the reader discovers something about the plot.
The story is nothing more than a collection of scenes. These scenes can be short snippets within chapters, or they can be the chapters themselves. It’s entirely up to the author. The key is that each scene must move the story along.
The worst thing the author can do is waste a scene. There are many ways to waste a scene. Some examples are:
The info dump: Authors like to take up scenes by dumping a lot of info on the reader. Maybe it’s the life story of one of the characters. Maybe it’s the background justification for why something happens the way it does in the story. Maybe it’s the complete history of the temple the main character is sneaking into. Ding ding ding ding! Wrong answer. This is a sure way to bore your reader to death and encourage them to skip sections. It does nothing to move the story along.
The political rant: Sometimes authors like to go off on a tangent and halt the story for a political rant. Oftentimes these come near the end of the story right when things are picking up. This brings the story to a screeching halt while the reader has to slog through the author’s political views. Boring and often polarizing, alienating and downright annoying!
The religious rant. See above.
The sidetrack story. Here, the author throws in one of their pet interests that has nothing to do with the main plot. They just like to talk about the subject or want to plug it. Sorry, save it for another story where it fits.
Each scene has to pertain to the plot of the story it is supposed to be about and it has to move the story along.
A scene must have a beginning, a middle and an end. It also has to end with a bang so that the reader is compelled to go on to the next scene to find out what happens.
If the scene ends resolved, why go on? What compels the reader to go on to the next chapter? You have to give it a cliffhanger with some pizzazz to compel the reader to find out what happens next. You don’t want the reader to lose interest with 100 pages left to go, do you? Sure, you can resolve things in a scene. However, you need to leave a paragraph or two past that resolution for the next cliffhanger. You need to do this for every scene right up until the last page. The exception might be where you use an epilogue.
Every paragraph within the scene must be important enough to be there.
With that being said, there are ways to fix some of those pesky problems I just mentioned. As for the info dump, if the information is that important, dole it out in small chunks. Disperse it amongst the action scenes. Let the characters tell it through dialogue, or show it through the exposition in short bursts spread out through different scenes. Don’t dump it all at once.
As for the political and religious rants? There is no way to openly leak those views into the story without the readers catching on to them because, let’s face it, your views are going to leak through in the way you write. Don’t make it blatant. The way the characters act naturally through you is going to be enough for the readers to catch on anyway. If you start leaning too heavily one way or the other, you will alienate a lot of people. At least try to keep your personal views out of it. Keep things as neutral as possible and let the readers interpret things as they see fit.
As for the sidetrack stories, if you really want to write about some pet interest, weave it into the story and make sure it is a key part and not some throwaway thread that is unnecessary. Trust me. An editor will have you cut the whole sub-plot if it isn’t. For example, if your story is about a serial killer and you want to talk about woodworking, you’d better make sure wood working tools are one of the killer’s weapons, or exotic wood strips are left behind as clues.
Remember, each scene needs a beginning, a middle and an end. As I mentioned in a previous post, it should start in the POV of the character driving that scene and it should end in their POV. It should mean something and move the plot forward. Finally, it should end with a cliffhanger so that the reader is urged to read on to the next scene.
If you include all of those elements and cut the bull, the reader won’t be able to put your book down.
POV IN CHAPTERS AND SCENES
It is very important to structure chapters and/or scenes properly with point of view (POV). As I’ve mentioned in a previous installment, there is nothing more annoying that head-hopping. A lot of writers do it but it tends to confuse the reader and you don’t want to do that if you can possibly avoid it. Besides that, your prose should be clear and concise. There should be no mistaking who is who, and who is seeing, feeling, hearing or doing what.
Let’s take a scene versus a chapter. Before we go on, I should define a scene. A scene is a section within a chapter, separated usually by a set of asterisks, a gap in the print, or some other means that tells the reader it is a separate section within the chapter. Some writers have multiple scenes within a chapter. Some do not have scenes at all, but just chapters. It doesn’t matter. Whatever works for you, the writer. The important thing is that a scene is an uninterrupted idea, from start to finish, that is part of the story.
To avoid head-hopping, a scene should have one main POV character. Whoever that main POV character is, the scene should always start and stop with some thought, dialogue or action from that person.
For instance, John is the POV character of the scene. The very first paragraph should start with him seeing, saying, hearing, feeling or doing something. No exceptions. At the end of that scene, it should end the same way, with him seeing, saying, hearing, feeling or doing something.
Where this rule is often broken is when the author mixes first or third person with omniscient. I’ve seen this style before and it quite often leads to a weak and confusing storyline. It can also lead to author intrusion. Some authors may not go directly to omniscient, but they like to foretell events for the reader at the end of the scene. This is a huge author intrusion violation. As a reader, I don’t want to know ahead of time. I want to be surprised and find out when the character does. As an author, you shouldn’t spoil it for your reader.
Little did John know how bad things would get when he finally opened that door.
Oh yeah? How about a big cup of shut the hell up, Mr. Author?
Moving forward. Whether writing scenes or just chapters, don’t lose control of your characters. It keeps things clear for you and your reader. Another part of structuring scenes and chapters is to have a bombshell at the end of each scene to urge the reader to want to go on reading (we’ll talk more about that in another segment). Sometimes, your bombshells may be revealed by the POV character. However, it is more likely that another character, circumstance or event is going to reveal the bombshell. In that case, have your POV character react to it before closing the chapter. Simple!
Quick Stuff
I’m going through a bit of turmoil right now, what with changing jobs and all. I am trying to build up a stock of posts so I can keep posting my regular Tuesday posts until the dust settles.
Be aware that I also sneak in additions to my other pages now and then, especially my Astronomy Page. I’ve noticed quite a few hits there lately. I appreciate all of you that are checking it out. Thanks!
One more thing. If there is a subject to do with writing you’d like me to talk about, please let me know and I’ll address it. If I don’t have the answer I’ll do some research and find out. If that doesn’t succeed, I’ll make something up! I’m rarely at a loss for words, at least on paper (or I should say, computer).
Thank all of you for your continued support. YOU ROCK!
Writing In Accents
When creating different characters, and trying to come up with distinguishing features for each one, it is tempting to use accents. Whether it’s an Irish brogue or a Texas drawl, an accent can give a distinction between characters, especially when you are trying to cut down on so many dialogue tags. However, there is a distinct down side to writing in accents.
It is one thing to hear an accent, but it’s entirely another to read it on the page. A group of lines with too many apostrophes is a red flag that you’re writing yourself into a problem. I once read a story with several of the characters talking in thick Scottish accents. Though I had no trouble understanding, and even visualizing their speech, it also made me hesitate as I adapted to the rhythm of each quirky word.
I’m just as guilty of using accents in my writing. In Lusitania Gold, I have two Irish/English ruffians that are the local dirt bags. Their accents are a combination of Irish and Liverpool English. I worked real hard to get their phrasing just right, interviewed several Irishmen and Englishmen along the way. I think I nailed their accents. However, one of the complaints I got from readers was that they couldn’t follow the dialogue. All that work! I originally wrote that story in 1995 and stubbornly kept to their stilted dialogue for the longest time. However, I’ve learned that to minimize writing in accents is one of those “rules” to follow. After suffering through many novels where the writer wrote in accents with abandon, I finally saw the light. That and enough badgering from my writers’ group. That rule is there for a reason.
Readability.
Not everyone has been overseas, or has been exposed to as many accents as I have. I can’t expect others to “get” what I’m doing.
The key to accents is to drop a word, here and there. Give the “illusion” they are speaking in that accent. Let the reader fill in the blanks. A Texas drawl can be done by the character saying “Boah” once in a while (that’s “boy,” by the way). You don’t need every word to be written like that. My Russian character, Vladimir will mispronounce certain words. I use that technique to portray his accent. I also use it for comic relief. Most people will hear their own version of a Russian accent whether it be Boris Badinov or Anton Yelchin. That creates the illusion of an accent. As hard as I worked on Lusitania Gold, one of the things I had to fix was the dialogue between those two dirt bags. It made the reading a lot easier.
Make it easier on yourself and your reader. It will pay off in the long run.
OMG!!!!! MELODRAMA!!!!!!
From the title, you might gather that something exciting is going on. Something really exciting. Something really really really exciting. Something really really really really… Doesn’t it strike you as a bit of overkill? That’s my roundabout way of bringing us to our next subject, the exclamation point.
I see it over and over again, especially with new writers. For some reason, it seems to be more prevalent with young adult writers. These young whippersnappers like to use the exclamation point to the point of making it meaningless.
For example:
Linda walked to the edge of the cliff. It was so far down! She was going to fall! I’d better back up before I slip!
Margie beeped the horn. “Linda! What are you doing? Come on! It’s getting late! Let’s go!”
There are so many exclamation marks that they lose their impact and become meaningless. My great friend and mentor, Carol Davis Luce is the person that kicked me in the butt on this one. She told me that exclamation marks should be used sparingly. That advice has been pounded into my head by many agents and editors. One name I’ll throw at you is Jim McCarthy, a literary agent from the big house, Dystel and Goderich. I had lunch with him one year at a Las Vegas Writer’s Conference and exclamation marks were one of the subjects. He echoed Carol’s words to me. “Exclamation points scream melodrama and exaggeration. Kill them!”
Uh oh. Did I just use one?
There is no specific grammatical rule, per se. However, there is a generally accepted rule of good writing that it is best to kill exclamation marks so that there are no more than one or two per chapter, at the most. If you can get away without using any for several chapters, so much the better. Instead of using an exclamation mark, write the narrative or dialogue to convey the exclamation without using it. Show it instead of tell it. Those are two words I hate (show and tell) because I have the most trouble with those two concepts. However, for this example, I’m able to grasp them well enough to show you how to do it.
Linda walked to the edge of the cliff. The extreme height made her dizzy. She grabbed a nearby tree to keep her balance. I’d better back up before I slip.
Margie beeped the horn and yelled through the window. “Linda, what are you doing? Come on. It’s getting late. Let’s go.”
Notice the difference? Those two paragraphs went from seven exclamation marks down to none. In the first one, I eliminated all of them by describing her feelings instead of plastering a bunch of those marks around some telling sentences. In the second sentence, I cured them by adding a yelling tag.
That was just one example of how you can eliminate exclamation marks by changing how you write your exposition and dialogue. Improve your word pictures and you won’t need them.
I have a bad habit of overusing exclamation marks in personal e-mails. In fact, I always have to go back through every e-mail and eliminate them. I do it every time. I’m very diligent about cutting them from my formal writing but when it comes to personal e-mails, watch out.
Exclamation marks are another habit I’ve noticed in Brit and Australian writers. They tend to use them a lot more. The biggest offender I know of is Australian and one I would call a favorite of mine. I won’t mention his name but he likes to overuse them as well as write passive and head hop. He would never get past a first read with an American agent.
Do yourself a favor. Perform a word search and look for exclamation marks. Dump 99% of them. You will find that most of them you don’t need and if you do, restructure the sentence to say it another way so you don’t need to use them. On the rare occasion where they are unavoidable, of course use one. Try to keep down to no more than say… one per chapter. They’ll have more impact and you’ll be better off if you can stick with that.
USELESS WORDS AND PHRASES
We’re all told we need to tighten our writing. One way to do that is to eliminate extraneous words that don’t add any value to the sentence. First, I’m going to talk about two phrases that bug the daylights out of me, then we’ll go into a few other unnecessary words.
It’s bad enough that we have to deal with passive phrases. Sure, there is room to have the occasional passive word here and there. There is nothing wrong with that. What makes these passive words bad is when they’re used to excess and especially when they’re used to convey nothing useful. That is the key. Are the words used to convey something useful? Or, are the words just extraneous? Do these extra words add any real value to the sentence, or are they just fluff… are they trivial?
I’m talking about started to and began to. It is true that someone may start or begin to do something, but those two words should only be used if the person is interrupted.
Joe started to speak, but Jody slapped him.
Marylin began to cry, but Max shook her before a tear could run down her cheek.
In both cases, they started or began to do something but were interrupted. That is okay.
Below is how these phrases are mostly used, and why they shouldn’t be.
Joe began to sneeze.
Huh? He “started to” sneeze? Either Joe sneezed or he didn’t. “Started to” is very passive and vague.
Joe sneezed.
That’s direct, and tells you all you need to know with only two words, instead of four.
Marylin started to cry. Or, Marylin began to cry.
Once again, she either cried, or she didn’t.
Marylin cried.
Or to make it more picturesque while still keeping it active:
Marylin broke out in sobs. Or, Marylin collapsed in the chair and cried.
Now there is no doubt what she did. Nothing vague or passive there.
As some of you know, my stories are heavy on dialogue. Because of that, I’ve learned a few things that in the rush of the moment, I used to forget about and had to clean up later. It is a weakness I’ve noticed in a lot of writers. I’m talking about So and Well.
I’ve had a tendency to start dialogue with both of those offending words. I’m better at eliminating them before I write them, but I used to add them into almost every sentence. Even though people say them in real life, it doesn’t come across well on the written page.
“Well, I’ll go to the store.”
This should be “I’ll go to the store.” The extra “Well” doesn’t convey anything except hesitation on the speaker’s part. Sure, we all use it, but on the page, it is an extra word that doesn’t serve a legitimate purpose.
“So, that’s what it’s all about.” This one may seem a little fuzzy, because the “So” could be the speaker forumlating their reply vocally. However, it is still usually better to write it: “That’s what it’s all about.” It could be used occasionally, but sparingly, to add color to the dialogue. However, as writers, we tend to overuse the word. A LOT. If you’re going to use So, keep it to no more than one per chapter.
In both instances, you tightened up your dialogue by deleting a word that has vague value, if any at all.
Now for another issue: just. We use just in real dialogue all the time. However, in story dialogue, it should be used sparingly. In narrative, it should be used even more sparingly unless it is key to the sentence, or for effect. I have seen very few cases where it is necessary.
Harry just about hit the ball with the bat.
Huh? Either he hit it or he didn’t.
Harry missed the ball by the breadth of a hair. A more vivid picture and more direct. The original sentence is so vague it screams “passive.”
I’ve found that I use just a lot in my narratives. With a word search, I went through The Greenhouse, found several hundred, and eliminated all but three of them (Those three were in dialogue, by the way).
“They just had their going away party.” In this case, the just could be used because it is dialogue. However, if it was in the narrative, the sentence should be: They had their going away party yesterday. “Yesterday” gives you a positive clear image of when the party happened. “just had” doesn’t tell you a thing. Was it yesterday? A few hours ago?
Do a word search for just and then look at each sentence where you use it. You’d be surprised how many of them you can eliminate by a simple rewording of the sentence. It will make your narrative and your dialogue that much stronger.
There are so many examples I could write a book, just on that subject alone. However, these examples should put you on the “write” track. If you learn to eliminate these useless words and phrases, your work will be tight and right.
TAUTOLOGIES
One of the things every writer must do is get to the point. It is your responsibility not only to entertain your reader, but get there with the fewest words possible. Your job is not to impress your reader with how many words you can spew out, or how big a word count you can use to describe what a flower looks like, it’s how you can convey your word picture in the most efficient way possible. GET TO THE POINT!
Word economy is a huge factor in the writing and editing process. One of the tricks of the trade is to look for unnecessary words and phrases that can be eliminated, redundancies that don’t add anything, words that bog down the flow of the prose. One way to clean things up is to look for tautologies.
Now you might ask, what is a tautology? A tautology is using different words to say the same thing, even if the repetition doesn’t necessarily provide clarity. I had no idea I was doing this until a member of our writer’s group did a presentation on it several years ago. It stuck with me. I want to give her credit, but I can’t remember her name. If I come across it later, I will announce it because she changed my life!
Once I became aware of tautologies, I discovered that I’d embedded many of them into my writing. Embarrassing myself in the process, I found several hundred words I could eliminate from an average manuscript. It came as a wakeup call. I think it did the same for many members of our group.
I’m about to list a series of examples to give you all your wakeup call. I would venture to guess some of you are going to have a bit of a rude awakening. How many of you have phrases like:
Stand up
Sit down
Whisper quietly
Slam hard
Hit hard
Scream loudly
Yell loudly
Run fast
Dig down
Jump up
Crawl slowly
The list goes on. Every one of those word pairs contains chaff at the end… a tautology… an extra word. Dump them! They are redundant, they are obvious, your reader already knows!
Of course, there are always exceptions. Or, are there? For instance, what if a character jumps up on a ledge? How about the character jumps onto the ledge? Or the character jumps down into the pit? Instead the character jumps into the pit. See? Was that so hard?
Now it’s time to slash and burn. Try this. Check the word count of your MS before you look for tautologies. Write it down. Now do a word search or just do an edit and look for them. When you are done, check that word count again. You might be surprised.
Happy editing!
“AND”, “BUT”, THE COLON AND SEMI-COLON IN FICTION
One of my pet peeves is narrative sentences that start with “and,” and “but.” Whenever I edit someone’s work, I always challenge the writer on those sentences. Though some may disagree with that, I feel that starting a sentence with “and” or “but” is just plain bad English. It is like starting a sentence in the middle of a thought. In addition, there is always a better way to construct a sentence. There are plenty of instances where one will find sentences starting with those words yet most of the better editors will get rid of them, especially with first-time authors.
Jim went to the store. And it rained. This should be written: Jim went to the store in the rain. Or: When Jim drove to the store, it rained.
Mary had plenty to bitch about. It was her birthday and everyone forgot. And it was raining. This could be changed to: Mary had plenty to bitch about. Everyone forgot her birthday. On top of that, it rained.
She cursed all her life. But, that didn’t mean she would tolerate it from Randy. Instead it could be something like: She cursed all her life, but that didn’t mean she would tolerate it from Randy. Or: She cursed all her life. That didn’t mean she would tolerate it from Randy.
There are a hundred ways to avoid using And and But to start a sentence. Another way to avoid using But is to start a sentence using However.
When it comes to dialogue, all bets are off. The rules of grammar don’t apply. The difference is, not to abuse the rules. T hough it may be good to write how people talk, reading how people talk can be annoying. However, that’s a different presentation!
* * *
Technical writing conveys information or teaches something.
Fictional writing is reading for pleasure. Your job is to make your prose as easy to read as you can.
Colons and semi-colons are just an excuse for breaking up a long sentence without using a period, similar to and. They’re used extensively in technical writing. However, for fiction, they are unnecessary and downright annoying. Fiction is supposed to be fun and easy, not complicated and technical. Remember, your writing should be at the elementary school level, to about the 6th grade level. Long sentences, especially long sentences complicated with colons and semi-colons can jerk the reader right out of the story, and the mood.
Wherever you have a colon or semi-colon, change it to a period or restructure the sentence. Make it two sentences or even three. It’s not that hard!
Colons and semi-colons can mean several things.
#1: Lists.
#2: The sentence is too long.
#3: The author is trying to educate the reader instead of entertain.
#4: The author is trying to write to a level higher than elementary school level.
Jeremy hated three things with a passion: Loud music, dating and onions.
List list list. True, this is a small example, but the realities can get complicated to the extreme. I’ve seen sentences like this expanded to a paragraph covering an entire page.
Jeremy stretched and turned to Wendy. “The three things I hate the most are loud music, dating and onions.”
In this case I turned a telling statement into showing by making it dialogue. The point is that the colon could be eliminated many ways.
In fiction, breaking some rules is unavoidable and not unhealthy. However, there are some rules like these that step over the line. They are in a long list that go along with misspellings, incomplete sentences and other examples of bad grammar.
There is no reason to ever start a narrative sentence with And or But. There is never a reason to ever use colons or semi-colons in narrative either, except when quoting something that already has one in it, such as referencing a…
Technical manual.
As I’ve said before, nobody expects you to write perfect. Learn these things as you go along but for goodness sakes, write first and worry about it when you edit! As you gain your chops, you’ll get better at catching things like this and will find them less and less when you do your next edit. Learn these techniques early on, but don’t freak out and dwell on them to the point where you stop writing over it. Learning these techniques will come with practice.
Final thoughts. It’s hard enough to break into this business. Don’t give an agent or editor another excuse to single you out as a rank amateur and throw your work in the slush pile.
POV – THE BANE OF NEW WRITERS Part 2
To use POV effectively, each scene should be told through the eyes of one character, the one driving that scene. In other words, that scene is seen, heard and felt by a specific character, not several at the same time. Every sentence should be how that character would see or perceive what’s going on. Unless your character is a mind reader, he or she cannot tell what another character is thinking. At the same time, they cannot see something that is physically impossible for them to see, or understand things they have no knowledge of (this is where first person can become awkward, especially in intense action scenes). Other characters can speak and perform actions, but any thoughts or feelings must be expressed only through the eyes of the character driving the scene.
If another character expresses feelings or thoughts within a scene, they must be visual or audio so that the main character of that scene can see, hear or feel them and perceive them. For example, the POV character of the scene is Jane. During the scene, Alex is disappointed in something. How do we know this? Jane has to see or perceive this by something Alex says, the expression on his face, or something he does, like his body language. Since it’s Jane’s scene, she has to perceive everything that is happening. It can’t be Alex. That would be a POV violation. It can’t be you, the author, or that would be author intrusion. Both of these violations can jerk the reader out of the story. If Jane perceives Alex’s disappointment, it’s a perfectly natural way to keep the reader immersed into the story.
Randall didn’t like the idea of walking down that alley. This first sentence establishes the scene in Randall’s POV. He’d been attacked before. He was sure some deranged killer lurked behind that green dumpster on the right side. Now this continues his POV as he thinks of all the bad things that could happen by walking down that alley.
The next paragraph continues. Jeremy had to laugh at Randall’s paranoia. The guy was a total wimp. This is a POV violation. The scene is Randall’s, yet the author jumps into Jeremy’s head within the same scene. Now the reader has two different heads to contend with, and has to shift POV. This is likely to confuse the reader. Randall can’t possibly know what Jeremy is thinking, so how does he know this?
You can correct his by changing what Jeremy sees into dialogue. Jeremy laughed. “Man, you’re the most paranoid guy I know. You’re a total wimp.” Turning Jeremy’s thoughts into dialogue keeps the scene in Randall’s POV because now Randall can hear and react to what Jeremy says. The dialogue reflects what Jeremy is thinking.
Randall stepped down the alley with Jeremy in tow. His eyes bored into every shadow. What he didn’t know was that the alley was empty and he was worried for nothing. The first two sentences are solidly in Randall’s POV. However, the third sentence is omniscient and author intrusion. In other words, Jeremy couldn’t possibly know what is going to happen, and the author is blatantly telling you. The fix for that third sentence is: When they reached the other end of the alley, he sighed with relief. It was empty. This puts the same thought solidly into his POV.
When the POV changes within a paragraph or a scene, it is known as head-hopping. This is the sign of an amateur and should be avoided. Sure, you will see some big-name authors doing it, some because they can get away with it, others under the guise of style or technique, but those are garbage excuses for poor writing. The thing is that as a new writer, no editor or agent worth their salt is going to let you get away with it. Not only that, you are going to make it harder on your readers and that is something you don’t want to do.
There is nothing wrong with changing POV within a story. However, it needs to be done in the right way. If you want to get into another character’s head, change scenes, or start a new chapter.
Another thing about POV. First, ALWAYS start and stop a scene or chapter in that character’s dialogue, thoughts or actions. I’ll go more into that in another blog on structuring chapters, but always start a scene or chapter with either dialogue or some action or thought from that character. Second, ALWAYS end it with their dialogue, thought or action.
By keeping your POV’s straight, your readers will appreciate it, whether consciously or subconsciously, and you will have one less excuse for an agent to toss your submission into the reject pile.
POV – THE BANE OF NEW WRITERS Part 1
One of the most dreaded “rules” of fiction writing, and one of the least understood by new writers, is point of view (POV). POV is either whoever is speaking, thinking, driving the scene, or who is telling the story.
Because there seems to be a host of arbitrary rules for new writers doesn’t mean they’re not good ideas. POV is the perfect example. Have you ever read a book and discovered there was something about it that didn’t sit right? Maybe you skipped whole paragraphs, sections, or reached certain points where you were confused, lost, and had no idea what was going on. POV could be the problem.
Before we get into the mechanics of using POV, let’s discuss a few (but not all) types of POV. There is first person, where the story is told through the eyes of the character. In this type of story, you will see a lot of I’s, me’s and my’s throughout. I picked myself off the ground and rushed to the door. Many authors prefer this viewpoint as they feel the reader will become more immersed in the character if they’re seeing what that character is seeing through their eyes. I personally despise that point of view, but that’s a whole ‘nuther blog and not the point of this presentation.
Another type of viewpoint is omniscient. The story is told through the eyes of “God,” an omnipotent viewpoint as if it were being told by an all-seeing being. The story is not seen or told by a character but by a narrator (the author). Things are not seen through the eyes of the characters. If it is told well, the viewpoint is neutral. If not, it gets into something called author intrusion which jerks the reader out of the story and into the personality of the author. The characters see and know things they shouldn’t and couldn’t because the author (or God) tells you ahead of time. The author might spoil things for you by foretelling events you shouldn’t know until the characters discover them.
The most commonly used POV is third person, past tense (versus present tense). In third person, the story is told through the eyes of a character, but as it has happened. In other words, instead of “I put on my hat and rushed through the door.” It would be “Jim put on his hat and rushed through the door.” In third person, you, as the author have a lot more leeway to describe things and show things that first person doesn’t allow. In first person, action scenes don’t play out near as well as they do in third person.
Since I mentioned past tense, I should also mention present tense. Either first or third can be written in present tense. Some authors feel that the story is more immediate or more urgent if written in present tense. For example, in first person, “I put my hat on and rush through the door.” Or in third person, “Jim puts his hat on and rushes through the door.”
For me, as a reader, I find that anything written in present tense drives me nuts. It’s a personal preference, but I’ll put a book down because I can’t get through one written in that style. I won’t mention the author’s name (but her initials are PC… cough cough). I’m still a big fan when she writes third person, past tense. Unfortunately, she tends to write this wretched first person present tense. It’s so irritating, I can hardly get through a paragraph let alone an entire book. I know another author that writes third person present tense. Same thing. Can’t read it.
Some authors like to mix POV’s. In the writing world, that is perfectly acceptable and seems to be a trendy thing to do, though it can be hard to pull off successfully. The most common used to be third person and omniscient. However, keep in mind that these POV shifts are from one chapter or scene to the next, NOT mixed together! Another style that is becoming more common is first and third person. That is why I always leaf through books by authors I haven’t read. I’ve been tricked before. I don’t like first person, and I don’t like present tense, so I specifically leaf through a book and look for those features.
Regardless of which POV you decide to go for, there are some mechanical rules you need to follow. We’ll go over them in part 2.
The Worlds Of Fred Rayworth 